Monday, November 30, 2009

The Challenge

The past couple of days have been challenging. Chloe is going through a growth spurt and is also getting more teeth. It's hard when you have a normally happy baby. The cries of pain go straight through your heart. We've been using homeopathic teething stuff that works pretty well, but she is also so stubborn that she won't go to sleep. Even now I am watching her roll around on the monitor as she fights her nap. But, these are the times when I need to remember that I am the parent and need to do what is right for her, like forcing her to nap. Sheesh. She's been up at night too, eating every 3 hours and not just for comfort. She is starving! I bought some food today and some disposable spoons to keep in my diaper backpack so that I can feed her when I'm out. When you nurse, you don't think about taking things for food with you. I just gotta get into the habit. Fortunately, she let me exercise this AM for 30 minutes so I at least got a little time to myself. Looking forward to doing my strengthening routine tomorrow! I haven't lost a lot of weight yet, but I've noticed that my body is changing in its shape and tone. Woot!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Stealing an idea

As I'm sure many of you have seen, at this time of year, people always write things on their blogs about what they are thankful for. A couple of mommy blogs I read also include letters to their children. So I thought that maybe I would combine both into a blog post. So, here is my letter to Chloe and why I am thankful for her:

Dear Chloe,
You are now 5 months old. Practically a teenager in my eyes. You are growing so quickly, changing everyday. When I look back at pictures of you when you were born, I can hardly believe that you have morphed into the infant you are now. Gone is that fragile, wobbly, screaming baby and in her place is a sturdy little girl, ready to sit up on her own and take on the world.

Our path was rough. Just getting you here into the world was ugly. I haven't even written about my labour because I've pretty much blocked it from my mind. I don't want to re-live that experience. To quote dooce "it sucked and then I cried".

Nursing you was such a challenge. There were many days and nights filled with tears over why I was in so much pain and why we weren't having this awesome experience that I heard about. And I suppose that is somewhat still true. I can't wait until you are 1 and you can start having cow's milk. I would like my body back please. I've shared it with you for 14 months already. But that's ok as I see how you are thriving with nursing and I wouldn't have it any other way.

We could also talk about sleep. You do not sleep well at night. My mom says it is payback from when I was a child as I was a poor sleeper as well. It's so frustrating when strangers go "oh she should be sleeping through the night by now". Well you don't. (See, cranky from lack of sleep)

But would I change anything? Not at all. I really can't remember what my life was like before you were here. It's amazing how much love you can have for one little thing. Even on days where I am up to my ears in your poop and cheesy spit up, you flash me that smile and my heart melts. And now, there's even teeth involved. TEETH!

So yes, of course I'm thankful for you. I'm thankful for your smile, your laugh, your smell, your cuddles, the way you hang onto me when I carry you, the way you reach for me when I pick you up, the splashing in the bathtub and a myriad of other things that I can't even begin to list now. I'm thankful that we are going to be able to share a lot of firsts with family and friends too. First thanksgiving, first Christmas, first Birthday. You've already had your first trip to Disneyland. =)

So thanks for being you. I couldn't ask for anything more.

Thursday, November 05, 2009

new things

Today was my first session with a trainer at the gym. She is a sick woman but I also somewhat enjoyed it. Well, except for the part where I felt like throwing up about halfway through. But that passed with a little water. Other than that, she is setting up an awesome program for me that I will get to continue once I've used up my visits with her. I've decided to take Fridays off though to give my body a rest. I already went 5 days this week. =)

On another note, Chloe has 1 tooth already through the gum with its neighbor threatening to burst through any day now. She's also doing well with her cereal and applesauce. Next week we'll introduce either pears or sweet potatoes I think. I also bought her a sippy cup which she can grab and put in her mouth. She's not quite sure how to suck out of the spout yet but we are practicing.
She has also started grabbing onto the ottoman and standing up as she hates to be sitting in one place for more than a few minutes. I seriously think she has been on this earth before.

On a sad note, it is 5 years ago today that my grandma died. She was a wonderful woman. We all miss her and wish that she could have met Chlo as I'm sure she would have been so proud. But, I know she is watching us from heaven and guiding me in the right direction.