Insomnia is difficulty getting to sleep or staying asleep, or having nonrefreshing sleep for at least 1 month. I think when you have a kid, a job or just a life, this happens to all of us. A bout here and there. I seem to be in the throes of this right now. Feeling tired, but not wanting to sleep at night. I have read 4 books in the past week. Getting in to bed at 9:30 and then falling asleep at 12 or 1 after reading and reading and reading. God bless the kindle app on my iPad.
My mind has been working overtime. My friend lost a pregnancy last week. We haven't spoken since. She said she didn't want to talk. I feel so lost, so helpless. What can I do? I guess just give her space for now and she'll talk when she's ready. I just hope this friendship isn't lost because of this.
And now, I'm tired. Do I go to bed and lie there? Or do I read?
“Worry is the darkroom in which negatives are developed” So yeah, maybe to bed but not to worry.
Did I mention I'm taking a photography class? It's been on my list for awhile, and I'm finally doing it! Wish me luck.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Tuesday, October 05, 2010
ER and back
Chloe was first sick last Wednesday. She barfed in the car on the way to swimming. I thought that she had just put her fingers in her mouth and choked herself as she had been doing because of her teeth. But then she threw up again about an hour later. This was the beginning of her first bout with a nasty virus.
She threw up again Thursday, Friday morning and Saturday morning, but by Saturday afternoon she was back to her usual self. We thought she was over it. Then I went to pick her up on Sunday morning from my moms house. On the way home she threw up again and I've never seen so much mass come out of her. I don't know what it was or where it came from because she hadn't really eaten anything in 5 days. She slept for 2 hours straight when she got home and then when she woke up she wouldn't let us go. For those who know Chlo well, she is never still. Hugs are fleeting. She hates to be held most times. On Sunday, she wouldn't let go. She dozed on us throughout the morning. She was lethargic. This had me worried.
I had been conversing with the advice nurses at Kaiser (a great service, BTW) for several days. On Sunday, they made an appointment for us to see an on duty pediatrician. He recommended that we go to the ER to get her some fluids. At that point, she had been screaming for about an hour and didn't stop.
Let me just say that the staff at the ER at Santa Teresa were amazing. The nurses were fabulous. They got her IV in on the first try. A chest x-ray was negative. Her blood work came back negative for bacterial infection so things were looking up. Once the first bag of fluid was in, she started to perk up. Then they had to do a catheter to get a sterile urine sample, because toddler girls can often have UTI's the have no other symptoms besides vomiting and diarrhea. Oh yeah, forgot to mention the diarrhea. That was fun too.
So, in the end she was moderately dehydrated from gastroenteritis. 1.5 bags of saline later, she was ready to go home. Quite a scare for us, but she was a trooper. And of course we knew she was better because when we left she said, "what's this?" about the straw from juice they gave her. She hadn't talked much in 5 days. So we knew, our girl was back. Because these days, it's nothing but "what's this". But after being in that emergency setting, I'm so thankful our girl is healthy. I couldn't go through that again any time soon.
She threw up again Thursday, Friday morning and Saturday morning, but by Saturday afternoon she was back to her usual self. We thought she was over it. Then I went to pick her up on Sunday morning from my moms house. On the way home she threw up again and I've never seen so much mass come out of her. I don't know what it was or where it came from because she hadn't really eaten anything in 5 days. She slept for 2 hours straight when she got home and then when she woke up she wouldn't let us go. For those who know Chlo well, she is never still. Hugs are fleeting. She hates to be held most times. On Sunday, she wouldn't let go. She dozed on us throughout the morning. She was lethargic. This had me worried.
I had been conversing with the advice nurses at Kaiser (a great service, BTW) for several days. On Sunday, they made an appointment for us to see an on duty pediatrician. He recommended that we go to the ER to get her some fluids. At that point, she had been screaming for about an hour and didn't stop.
Let me just say that the staff at the ER at Santa Teresa were amazing. The nurses were fabulous. They got her IV in on the first try. A chest x-ray was negative. Her blood work came back negative for bacterial infection so things were looking up. Once the first bag of fluid was in, she started to perk up. Then they had to do a catheter to get a sterile urine sample, because toddler girls can often have UTI's the have no other symptoms besides vomiting and diarrhea. Oh yeah, forgot to mention the diarrhea. That was fun too.
So, in the end she was moderately dehydrated from gastroenteritis. 1.5 bags of saline later, she was ready to go home. Quite a scare for us, but she was a trooper. And of course we knew she was better because when we left she said, "what's this?" about the straw from juice they gave her. She hadn't talked much in 5 days. So we knew, our girl was back. Because these days, it's nothing but "what's this". But after being in that emergency setting, I'm so thankful our girl is healthy. I couldn't go through that again any time soon.
Thursday, September 09, 2010
love vs hate
So I've always had a problem with my skin. In high school I took medication to try to clear up my skin that was so powerful they made me sign a paper saying I wouldn't get pregnant because it would mess up a baby really badly. After many years of school, I now know why.
And now, at 30, I'm still struggling. And the problem really is that I have hyperpigmented skin, which means that it retains brown discoloration easily. I forgot to put sunscreen over my eyebrows right after I got them waxed one time and since then I have had a brown discoloration over my right eyebrow.
Of course it doesn't help that I scratch my face because it gets so itchy. This of course leads to irritation which leads to brown spots!
I have been using some skin products specifically targeted at discoloration from ROC and Dermatologica (PRICEY). So far I have seen some minor changes but more so as an overall improvement rather then a fading of the markings.
Of course I know my hormones play a role in this as well because when I was pregnant my skin was much better. And now, having just had my first period in 23 months (I KNOW, RIGHT?) my skin is going super haywire again. Gah.
All I can say is bless you Clinique and Bare Minerals. You guys are my saving grace.
But let's not end on a negative note. Let's talk about something I am proud of. Like my hair.
When I was 29, I vowed to cut my hair short when I turned 30. You know, a real grown up haircut. And then Chloe was born and my hair totally changed texture and it gained this ability to be styled and HOLD A STYLE. So then I decided to just let it grow again. So now, we're back to long hair and getting longer. I have also figured out what to do with my fringe (a bit too thick so pulling some back to let it grow out), but overall I'm really happy. Plus I found a new place up here in Fremont to get my hair colored at and she only charges 70 for a whole head of highlights! Score.
Verdict: loving the hair, meh on the skin. But hey, i can always use my fringe to cover up my forehead on bad skin days. I can multitask, ya'll.
And now, at 30, I'm still struggling. And the problem really is that I have hyperpigmented skin, which means that it retains brown discoloration easily. I forgot to put sunscreen over my eyebrows right after I got them waxed one time and since then I have had a brown discoloration over my right eyebrow.
Of course it doesn't help that I scratch my face because it gets so itchy. This of course leads to irritation which leads to brown spots!
I have been using some skin products specifically targeted at discoloration from ROC and Dermatologica (PRICEY). So far I have seen some minor changes but more so as an overall improvement rather then a fading of the markings.
Of course I know my hormones play a role in this as well because when I was pregnant my skin was much better. And now, having just had my first period in 23 months (I KNOW, RIGHT?) my skin is going super haywire again. Gah.
All I can say is bless you Clinique and Bare Minerals. You guys are my saving grace.
But let's not end on a negative note. Let's talk about something I am proud of. Like my hair.
When I was 29, I vowed to cut my hair short when I turned 30. You know, a real grown up haircut. And then Chloe was born and my hair totally changed texture and it gained this ability to be styled and HOLD A STYLE. So then I decided to just let it grow again. So now, we're back to long hair and getting longer. I have also figured out what to do with my fringe (a bit too thick so pulling some back to let it grow out), but overall I'm really happy. Plus I found a new place up here in Fremont to get my hair colored at and she only charges 70 for a whole head of highlights! Score.
Verdict: loving the hair, meh on the skin. But hey, i can always use my fringe to cover up my forehead on bad skin days. I can multitask, ya'll.
Friday, August 27, 2010
One of those days
Where you can't believe you made it though
where I felt so overwhelmed and angry with my child, even though I know she couldn't help it
where I felt like crying 3 times but held it back because I didn't want to scare C
where I really missed my mum because she's still away
where I just wanted to go to bed and wake up in a week
where I allowed myself this complaint time but then made sure to remind myself of things that are good
I am so blessed. We all are.
Even on the days that are bad, I have it so much better than most.
And even though the frustration built, and my walls were shaken, I came out on top.
Plus I bought a new lip stain/balm.
yay
where I felt so overwhelmed and angry with my child, even though I know she couldn't help it
where I felt like crying 3 times but held it back because I didn't want to scare C
where I really missed my mum because she's still away
where I just wanted to go to bed and wake up in a week
where I allowed myself this complaint time but then made sure to remind myself of things that are good
I am so blessed. We all are.
Even on the days that are bad, I have it so much better than most.
And even though the frustration built, and my walls were shaken, I came out on top.
Plus I bought a new lip stain/balm.
yay
Thursday, August 19, 2010
The finger
The universe is out to get me.
I was doing so well with my exercising. i hadn't lost a lot of weight but my body shape was totally changing and I was feeling so good. Then my foot started hurting so I decided to rest it. And wouldn't you know it it doesn't feel ANY BETTER.
Then, Chloe woke up yesterday with big welts on her body after having several days of extreme crankiness due to her teeth. Fortunately, the welts are gone and she seems to be doing better. Although, it seems as though her diaper rash (another gift from the teeth) is coming back so that's always fun.
And now, Tim is sick. Poor guy is working so hard doing 2 jobs that he's falling apart. Ugh.
Ugh.
I was doing so well with my exercising. i hadn't lost a lot of weight but my body shape was totally changing and I was feeling so good. Then my foot started hurting so I decided to rest it. And wouldn't you know it it doesn't feel ANY BETTER.
Then, Chloe woke up yesterday with big welts on her body after having several days of extreme crankiness due to her teeth. Fortunately, the welts are gone and she seems to be doing better. Although, it seems as though her diaper rash (another gift from the teeth) is coming back so that's always fun.
And now, Tim is sick. Poor guy is working so hard doing 2 jobs that he's falling apart. Ugh.
Ugh.
Friday, August 06, 2010
Weekend
Hello friends-
What is on your agenda this weekend? It's funny. Being a work at home/stay at home mom gives you a different perspective on weekends. Still look forward to them though. Although sometimes we run into a little snag as I want to get out and Tim wants to be home. But we work it out.
This weekend involves a birthday party and a happy hour. Sooo looking forward to both.
My effort to take more pictures is not going so well. I never seem to have my camera out when I need it. So maybe it needs to stay on the kitchen table. It's not going to do me much good sitting on the computer table in the den, is it?
And how did we get to August? Time continues to fly by. I'm halfway through my 30 day workout challenge. Haven't lost a lot of weight but my body is totally reshaping itself. I gotta keep that in mind when I disagree with my scale.
And now, I wait for that call. The one from the room where the peanut sleeps, butt in the air, paci hanging out of her mouth. I can't wait for her to nap, but then I can't wait for her to wake up....
What is on your agenda this weekend? It's funny. Being a work at home/stay at home mom gives you a different perspective on weekends. Still look forward to them though. Although sometimes we run into a little snag as I want to get out and Tim wants to be home. But we work it out.
This weekend involves a birthday party and a happy hour. Sooo looking forward to both.
My effort to take more pictures is not going so well. I never seem to have my camera out when I need it. So maybe it needs to stay on the kitchen table. It's not going to do me much good sitting on the computer table in the den, is it?
And how did we get to August? Time continues to fly by. I'm halfway through my 30 day workout challenge. Haven't lost a lot of weight but my body is totally reshaping itself. I gotta keep that in mind when I disagree with my scale.
And now, I wait for that call. The one from the room where the peanut sleeps, butt in the air, paci hanging out of her mouth. I can't wait for her to nap, but then I can't wait for her to wake up....
Sunday, August 01, 2010
Anniversary number 5
On Saturday, Tim and I celebrated our 5 year wedding anniversary.
The day started off with a trip to see the Wiggles at HP Pavillion. Chloe's favorite thing on TV is the Wiggles so we were really excited to see their live show. SO MUCH FUN! She went absolutely nuts when they came out and we were lucky that Jeff (the purple sleepy one) came down the row right in front of us and waved to Chloe. I know she won't remember but the look on her face was priceless.
After the show, we came home and got Chloe settled with my parents. They were kind enough to watch her overnight for us. We then went to Hotel Valencia at Santana Row. We stayed there after our wedding so thought it would be fitting to stay there again. Drinks at Straits; followed by dinner at LB steak. It was nice to get away for the night but I missed Chloe like mad. I swear she grew about an inch overnight.
Now we need to get something else on the Calendar. We've decided that we always need something to look forward to. =)
The day started off with a trip to see the Wiggles at HP Pavillion. Chloe's favorite thing on TV is the Wiggles so we were really excited to see their live show. SO MUCH FUN! She went absolutely nuts when they came out and we were lucky that Jeff (the purple sleepy one) came down the row right in front of us and waved to Chloe. I know she won't remember but the look on her face was priceless.
After the show, we came home and got Chloe settled with my parents. They were kind enough to watch her overnight for us. We then went to Hotel Valencia at Santana Row. We stayed there after our wedding so thought it would be fitting to stay there again. Drinks at Straits; followed by dinner at LB steak. It was nice to get away for the night but I missed Chloe like mad. I swear she grew about an inch overnight.
Now we need to get something else on the Calendar. We've decided that we always need something to look forward to. =)
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Stanley peanut
7 months
7 months? Really? I reiterate the title of my last post. EPIC FAIL! Of course I could always blame the kiddo for my absence, but really, it's just that I'm not a good blogger. I spend too much time snooping on other people and reading about them.
And why now return? Because a blog I have been reading has really made an impact on me.
kellehampton
read it
It's awesome
Just an excerpt that really hit me today
what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
Because these moments?
It's going to the beach, the woods, the park, the mountains, the store, the classroom, the office, a friend's house, your parents' house, your child's house, your own house...searching for the marrow of life, and sucking the bejesus out of it. It's the moment you held your arms out to welcome these flailing, crying tiny little creatures that fit deep into your grasp but even deeper into your heart. It's loving your kids with every fiber of your being.
It's in accepting that we are unfinished projects and in loving the finishing challenges that lie ahead. It's in happiness.
Talk about talent for writing. Thanks Kelle.
And why now return? Because a blog I have been reading has really made an impact on me.
kellehampton
read it
It's awesome
Just an excerpt that really hit me today
what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
Because these moments?
It's going to the beach, the woods, the park, the mountains, the store, the classroom, the office, a friend's house, your parents' house, your child's house, your own house...searching for the marrow of life, and sucking the bejesus out of it. It's the moment you held your arms out to welcome these flailing, crying tiny little creatures that fit deep into your grasp but even deeper into your heart. It's loving your kids with every fiber of your being.
It's in accepting that we are unfinished projects and in loving the finishing challenges that lie ahead. It's in happiness.
Talk about talent for writing. Thanks Kelle.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Epic Fail
So I think I'm not cut out to be a blogger. As much as I love to stalk other people and spend far too much time reading other mommy blogs, i just can't seem to keep any consistency with this. I often think, hey, that would be a great blog post...but then time passes on and I forget what I wanted to write. Doesn't mean I'm not going to post anymore, but the posts may be sparse and far in between. Anyway, things are pushing along. We are sleep training Chloe with the Ferber method and had a pretty good night last night. She doesn't fight going to sleep, it's the night waking we have a problem with. But, I feel optimistic and we should be seeing a big change by day 7. I think I can dedicate 7 days of my life to helping my child sleep better. I think...
Our life is a constant whirl of change. Chloe is growing up so fast. She eats like a horse (she always has) although now she is on solids she eats even more.
The hubby is still in bed (he couldn't sleep last night), Chloe is happy in her jumper watching PBS sprout and I need to eat, so I'm thinking pancakes are in order. Let's see if Chlo likes those. I mean, the kid likes pickles, so I think pancakes will be a hit.
Our life is a constant whirl of change. Chloe is growing up so fast. She eats like a horse (she always has) although now she is on solids she eats even more.
The hubby is still in bed (he couldn't sleep last night), Chloe is happy in her jumper watching PBS sprout and I need to eat, so I'm thinking pancakes are in order. Let's see if Chlo likes those. I mean, the kid likes pickles, so I think pancakes will be a hit.
Friday, December 11, 2009
A new mom
Since becoming a new mom, my view of the world has changed. I don't want to watch the news, read the paper or watch any sad films. I only want to surround myself with happy things. I know that is totally unrealistic, but I'm so sensitive now because of Chloe. I'm getting a little paranoid too. And a little morbid I think. I constantly worry about something happening to my family members, my friends and other things I can't control. It's horrible. I lay in bed at night and think about all the horrible things that could happen. But really, what good does that do? Is that normal? Is it hormonal? I don't know. The one thing I do know is that my world will never be the same. Some days good, some days bad, but always moving in a new direction. Because of her.
Monday, November 30, 2009
The Challenge
The past couple of days have been challenging. Chloe is going through a growth spurt and is also getting more teeth. It's hard when you have a normally happy baby. The cries of pain go straight through your heart. We've been using homeopathic teething stuff that works pretty well, but she is also so stubborn that she won't go to sleep. Even now I am watching her roll around on the monitor as she fights her nap. But, these are the times when I need to remember that I am the parent and need to do what is right for her, like forcing her to nap. Sheesh. She's been up at night too, eating every 3 hours and not just for comfort. She is starving! I bought some food today and some disposable spoons to keep in my diaper backpack so that I can feed her when I'm out. When you nurse, you don't think about taking things for food with you. I just gotta get into the habit. Fortunately, she let me exercise this AM for 30 minutes so I at least got a little time to myself. Looking forward to doing my strengthening routine tomorrow! I haven't lost a lot of weight yet, but I've noticed that my body is changing in its shape and tone. Woot!
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Stealing an idea
As I'm sure many of you have seen, at this time of year, people always write things on their blogs about what they are thankful for. A couple of mommy blogs I read also include letters to their children. So I thought that maybe I would combine both into a blog post. So, here is my letter to Chloe and why I am thankful for her:
Dear Chloe,
You are now 5 months old. Practically a teenager in my eyes. You are growing so quickly, changing everyday. When I look back at pictures of you when you were born, I can hardly believe that you have morphed into the infant you are now. Gone is that fragile, wobbly, screaming baby and in her place is a sturdy little girl, ready to sit up on her own and take on the world.
Our path was rough. Just getting you here into the world was ugly. I haven't even written about my labour because I've pretty much blocked it from my mind. I don't want to re-live that experience. To quote dooce "it sucked and then I cried".
Nursing you was such a challenge. There were many days and nights filled with tears over why I was in so much pain and why we weren't having this awesome experience that I heard about. And I suppose that is somewhat still true. I can't wait until you are 1 and you can start having cow's milk. I would like my body back please. I've shared it with you for 14 months already. But that's ok as I see how you are thriving with nursing and I wouldn't have it any other way.
We could also talk about sleep. You do not sleep well at night. My mom says it is payback from when I was a child as I was a poor sleeper as well. It's so frustrating when strangers go "oh she should be sleeping through the night by now". Well you don't. (See, cranky from lack of sleep)
But would I change anything? Not at all. I really can't remember what my life was like before you were here. It's amazing how much love you can have for one little thing. Even on days where I am up to my ears in your poop and cheesy spit up, you flash me that smile and my heart melts. And now, there's even teeth involved. TEETH!
So yes, of course I'm thankful for you. I'm thankful for your smile, your laugh, your smell, your cuddles, the way you hang onto me when I carry you, the way you reach for me when I pick you up, the splashing in the bathtub and a myriad of other things that I can't even begin to list now. I'm thankful that we are going to be able to share a lot of firsts with family and friends too. First thanksgiving, first Christmas, first Birthday. You've already had your first trip to Disneyland. =)
So thanks for being you. I couldn't ask for anything more.
Love
Mom
Dear Chloe,
You are now 5 months old. Practically a teenager in my eyes. You are growing so quickly, changing everyday. When I look back at pictures of you when you were born, I can hardly believe that you have morphed into the infant you are now. Gone is that fragile, wobbly, screaming baby and in her place is a sturdy little girl, ready to sit up on her own and take on the world.
Our path was rough. Just getting you here into the world was ugly. I haven't even written about my labour because I've pretty much blocked it from my mind. I don't want to re-live that experience. To quote dooce "it sucked and then I cried".
Nursing you was such a challenge. There were many days and nights filled with tears over why I was in so much pain and why we weren't having this awesome experience that I heard about. And I suppose that is somewhat still true. I can't wait until you are 1 and you can start having cow's milk. I would like my body back please. I've shared it with you for 14 months already. But that's ok as I see how you are thriving with nursing and I wouldn't have it any other way.
We could also talk about sleep. You do not sleep well at night. My mom says it is payback from when I was a child as I was a poor sleeper as well. It's so frustrating when strangers go "oh she should be sleeping through the night by now". Well you don't. (See, cranky from lack of sleep)
But would I change anything? Not at all. I really can't remember what my life was like before you were here. It's amazing how much love you can have for one little thing. Even on days where I am up to my ears in your poop and cheesy spit up, you flash me that smile and my heart melts. And now, there's even teeth involved. TEETH!
So yes, of course I'm thankful for you. I'm thankful for your smile, your laugh, your smell, your cuddles, the way you hang onto me when I carry you, the way you reach for me when I pick you up, the splashing in the bathtub and a myriad of other things that I can't even begin to list now. I'm thankful that we are going to be able to share a lot of firsts with family and friends too. First thanksgiving, first Christmas, first Birthday. You've already had your first trip to Disneyland. =)
So thanks for being you. I couldn't ask for anything more.
Love
Mom
Thursday, November 05, 2009
new things
Today was my first session with a trainer at the gym. She is a sick woman but I also somewhat enjoyed it. Well, except for the part where I felt like throwing up about halfway through. But that passed with a little water. Other than that, she is setting up an awesome program for me that I will get to continue once I've used up my visits with her. I've decided to take Fridays off though to give my body a rest. I already went 5 days this week. =)
On another note, Chloe has 1 tooth already through the gum with its neighbor threatening to burst through any day now. She's also doing well with her cereal and applesauce. Next week we'll introduce either pears or sweet potatoes I think. I also bought her a sippy cup which she can grab and put in her mouth. She's not quite sure how to suck out of the spout yet but we are practicing.
She has also started grabbing onto the ottoman and standing up as she hates to be sitting in one place for more than a few minutes. I seriously think she has been on this earth before.
On a sad note, it is 5 years ago today that my grandma died. She was a wonderful woman. We all miss her and wish that she could have met Chlo as I'm sure she would have been so proud. But, I know she is watching us from heaven and guiding me in the right direction.
On another note, Chloe has 1 tooth already through the gum with its neighbor threatening to burst through any day now. She's also doing well with her cereal and applesauce. Next week we'll introduce either pears or sweet potatoes I think. I also bought her a sippy cup which she can grab and put in her mouth. She's not quite sure how to suck out of the spout yet but we are practicing.
She has also started grabbing onto the ottoman and standing up as she hates to be sitting in one place for more than a few minutes. I seriously think she has been on this earth before.
On a sad note, it is 5 years ago today that my grandma died. She was a wonderful woman. We all miss her and wish that she could have met Chlo as I'm sure she would have been so proud. But, I know she is watching us from heaven and guiding me in the right direction.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Work out
So since I had Chloe, I've been sorta monitoring my weight. When I say sorta, I mean I get on the scale occasionally and go, "oh, I weigh the same now as I did when I got pregnant". Then sometimes I get on and it's like "oh crap I gained 3 pounds since yesterday, better stop eating all that cookie dough" (Like that will ever happen). However, I would really like to get back to exercising, but of course the big problem is being able to watch Chloe while I work out. Enter the possibility of Club One at Santana Row. They have nannies on staff to watch babies as young as 6 weeks! I know it's probably going to be expensive, but heck, I'll give up most of my coffee in order to get healthy. Plus, we're going to cut our netflix down to one at a time and make a few cuts elsewhere in our spending. Anyway, we are going in tomorrow morning for a free tour and a free workout with a trainer. I'm feeling motivated since seeing my dear friend Bee's great success with a trainer. If I could only achieve a fraction of what she has then I would be happy. So, free is free and we'll be at the gym tomorrow AM to see everything. Will let you know how it goes.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Harmony
So I've become a regular visitor to the Harmony Birth Center in Campbell over the past few weeks. They offer a lot of pre-natal services but also do a lot of post-natal work as well. I've been going to the breastfeeding class there on Tuesday. It's great to be with other bf moms and to hear that everyone is going through the same thing. Plus, the lactation consultant who runs the class gave me a few tips and changed the way that Chloe had been latching and since then I've had almost no pain when feeding her. Today, Chlo has gone 8 days without a bottle of formula to supplement. Of course, she will have to have a bottle here and there as I haven't got a store of milk pumped yet and I have a wedding and some chiropractic seminars to go to this month. But I am going to try to pump more to get a store going in the freezer for when grandma or dad is watching her and I'm out.
I also started a yoga class too with Chlo. It's not a lot of exercise, but it's fun to play together and I get some stretching in. It's amazing how tight my body is, especially my legs. I can't even keep my heels on the ground when I bend over. Before Tim started the budget season, I was pretty faithful about doing Wii EA exercise. However, since he's been working so much, I haven't been able to pass her off to him as much to exercise. But, now that the budget is done, I'm hoping to get back to that routine. Also, Chlo is getting better about taking regular naps in the day, so that will be my time to exercise. I only have about 4 pounds left to lose to get back to where I was before I got pregnant, but really I'd like to be another 15 pounds lighter overall so that will be my goal. Plus, once Julia gets back from Spain, we are going walking with the kiddos.
They also offer massage at Harmony which I think I am going to have to take them up on. They are pretty reasonable and also have services for dads as well. I'm thinking a "soothing stone massage" is in my future soon =)
I also started a yoga class too with Chlo. It's not a lot of exercise, but it's fun to play together and I get some stretching in. It's amazing how tight my body is, especially my legs. I can't even keep my heels on the ground when I bend over. Before Tim started the budget season, I was pretty faithful about doing Wii EA exercise. However, since he's been working so much, I haven't been able to pass her off to him as much to exercise. But, now that the budget is done, I'm hoping to get back to that routine. Also, Chlo is getting better about taking regular naps in the day, so that will be my time to exercise. I only have about 4 pounds left to lose to get back to where I was before I got pregnant, but really I'd like to be another 15 pounds lighter overall so that will be my goal. Plus, once Julia gets back from Spain, we are going walking with the kiddos.
They also offer massage at Harmony which I think I am going to have to take them up on. They are pretty reasonable and also have services for dads as well. I'm thinking a "soothing stone massage" is in my future soon =)
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Where I've been
It's amazing how time flies, huh? Sorry for the delay, all 3 of you who read my blog. =)
Chloe is now 3 months old. She is growing so quickly and changing every day. I looked back at some of her pictures last night on my phone from when she was born. What a tiny little thing she was! Tim and I were at hockey last night and I missed her so much that I had to look at the pictures on my phone. I'm THAT mom now.
Chloe is such a good baby. She only cries when she is hungry or tired and I've pretty much figured out what cry means what. We definitely have our ups and downs, but more ups really.
It's been a struggle nursing her, as I've had some trouble with pain, but I'm glad that I have persevered because I see how healthy she is and I know that it's the best for her right now.
The one thing I am looking forward to is her sleeping at night without needing to get up to eat. Right now she goes to bed about 10-10:30 and then wakes up about 3 or 4 to eat and then again at 6 or so. Then, we're up for the day. I always needed lots of sleep and loved to nap on a regular basis before Chloe. However, I think that once you have a baby, your body just changes to need less sleep. Because really, it's not about you any more.
And now, my days are filled with feeding, laundry, feeding, playing, singing songs, dealing with more poop and pee then I could ever imagine, more feeding, spit up, and more poop. But I wouldn't change a thing. As Tim and I keep saying, what did we ever do before her?
Chloe is now 3 months old. She is growing so quickly and changing every day. I looked back at some of her pictures last night on my phone from when she was born. What a tiny little thing she was! Tim and I were at hockey last night and I missed her so much that I had to look at the pictures on my phone. I'm THAT mom now.
Chloe is such a good baby. She only cries when she is hungry or tired and I've pretty much figured out what cry means what. We definitely have our ups and downs, but more ups really.
It's been a struggle nursing her, as I've had some trouble with pain, but I'm glad that I have persevered because I see how healthy she is and I know that it's the best for her right now.
The one thing I am looking forward to is her sleeping at night without needing to get up to eat. Right now she goes to bed about 10-10:30 and then wakes up about 3 or 4 to eat and then again at 6 or so. Then, we're up for the day. I always needed lots of sleep and loved to nap on a regular basis before Chloe. However, I think that once you have a baby, your body just changes to need less sleep. Because really, it's not about you any more.
And now, my days are filled with feeding, laundry, feeding, playing, singing songs, dealing with more poop and pee then I could ever imagine, more feeding, spit up, and more poop. But I wouldn't change a thing. As Tim and I keep saying, what did we ever do before her?
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
The first motherly rant
I will preface this post with a warning. This is about mom stuff. It will be one of only posts I make about mom stuff as I don't want to bore my tens of readers with inane drivel. However, today an outlet is needed. You see, Chloe will be 5 weeks old tomorrow. Tim and I have managed to keep her alive for 5 weeks now. Congrats to us is in order. However, after 5 weeks, I am starting to feel the weight of the world crushing down a bit. I've had a few teary days here and there, which I know is normal. However, today I cried for no reason because frankly, I'm so tired. I have always loved sleep. Naps were the highlight of my weekend. Now, those days are a distant memory. Last night I slept on the couch with Chloe on me and had to feed her every 2 hours. She must be growing. I know people say that it will get better, but the light at the end of that tunnel is hard to see right now. Tim has been wonderful in all this. He is my rock and my biggest support. But, since his boobs fail to produce what our daughter needs, he's a little left out. Even now as I write this I feel the tears welling up. It is hard for Tim to grasp as well, because there isn't one particular thing that is making me sad right now and there is nothing he can fix. His kindness and patience is a gift that I am so grateful for. So in the end what does this mean? Until she starts sleeping through the night do we just continue to suffer and keep that little ray of hope in our minds and hearts? I guess so. You can see how this is disheartening though, no? Anyway, that's all for now. Don't want to be redundant. Maybe tonight will be a better night. Maybe.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
updates
I realize that I have been negligent of the blog over the past month. I'm thinking its because of my new increased use of Twitter and occasional perusal of Facebook. So, baby was due on Friday and is now late. They will let me go until a week from Friday and then I will have to be induced =( My plan is to really do this naturally and let her come when she is ready, however, my OB said that the risk to the baby is just too great after 42 weeks. So, we shall see. She did also say that most people don't get past 41 before they deliver on their own, so fingers crossed that she'll be here by the end of the week. I'm not dilated yet, but that doesn't really matter. She is in position already and the OB could touch her head today. She's going to be a whopper as well, OVER 8 pounds. I don't look forward to pushing that girl out, but I know she's going to be big and healthy so I'm excited about that! Plus, I know that babies usually lose a little weight in the hospital so we shall see. Hopefully the next update will be with pics of our baby girl! Keep your fingers crossed for us.
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